Am I shy?

11/11/17

Why are you so shy? Growing up I was asked this question a lot.  I guess I was always a little shy.  Moreover, I think I was just a quiet person.  I preferred to sit and listen to what others were saying.  I liked to absorb and learn.

One-on-one, I loved to talk.  In a large group though, the thought of talking was overwhelming.  We moved a lot and I was often the new kid- an outsider looking in.  I remember wishing I were more extroverted and part of the crowd.

As I got older and excelled in school, I found myself feeling more isolated.  In visiting with former classmates at our 25-year class reunion, I discovered that others were somewhat intimidated by me in school.  They told me I was always so smart they weren't sure what to say around me.  Then there were others that felt I was somewhat of a snob because I never talked to them.  If they, and I, had only known.

Being this quiet person through much of my childhood meant that I was always observing, thinking about, and analyzing my surroundings.  I grew up thinking differently and eventually following a different path than many of my peers.  I married and started a family.  When raising my own children, I did my best to ensure they were at ease talking with their peers and allowed them ample opportunities to do so.  I am happy to say that they are all leaders in our community and enjoy many deep friendships.  That brings joy to my heart.

Eventually, I studied and became a teacher.  I found that I relate to students and have great empathy for their stories.  Talking with them comes easily.  For the last 17 years, I have taught English language learners.  Many of them come here silent and afraid.  It is very rewarding to provide them with the means to communicate with those around them.

After nearly 30 years as an educator, it is sometimes difficult to tell that I am an introvert.  I have presented at conferences and have been a guest speaker at several gatherings.  I have conducted trainings in our school district and have acted as a mentor to new teachers.  Despite these things, I still find myself retreating into isolation.  Extroversion does not come naturally; however, I know I must step outside of my comfort zone.

Surprisingly, I have become more extroverted over the past year.  I attribute this to social media.  This avenue has helped me to find my own voice and the courage to share my thoughts and feelings.  Sharing my voice has been the first step, however, real growth came from having others respond.  It has been the power of feedback that has brought me out of isolation and into the world.

This knowledge has helped me to see the benefit of social media for my students.  English language learners, in particular, need an opportunity to interact with others.  Social media is the first in a series of baby steps to accomplish this goal.  After all, talking to someone via the internet is much less intimidating than speaking face-to-face.

I introduce my students to blogging early in the year.  Our first blog shares who we are and our journey to the present.  For some students, I utilize speech-to-text resources because they are not yet able to write in English.  For other students, I have them dictate to me what they want to have written.  In either case, we create a presence.  The next step is responding to each other's blogs.

This year, we discovered Flipgrid which has enabled us to create verbal messages and receive verbal responses.  Speaking is becoming increasingly easy for the students.  We are discovering that the journey is not always comfortable, but we are getting there together.

I am reposting this from one of my previous posts.  I come back to its powerful message often.  We all have a story unique to ourselves.

This video of a TED talk by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie still says so very much.  It is my challenge to you to look at your students, their families, your colleagues, and others you should meet with new eyes.  Don't fall for the danger of a single story.